‘Tales from the Darkside’ Retro Recap: ‘The Trouble with Mary Jane’

Written by John Edward Betancourt

It is definitely safe to say, that quite the scourge now exists in the online world. Specifically, the self-proclaimed ‘expert’. For these wannabes… have made online life, quite the pain. Courtesy of misinformation and lies, and the products they hock and the general chaos they bring to the table with their uninformed opinions, and it is… outright exhausting to be online because of it. In fact, all of us just hope that someday, they will fade away and quit bothering folks and find something better to do with their lives. But alas, that day may never come for a reason that we don’t give enough thought to. 
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In that… while this is new to some, it’s not new to modern civilization. Because for generations on end, the huckster/self-proclaimed expert has always been around. By way of folks that just lied their way into professions before the internet or wrote self-help books under the guise of being the expert in question, and before that… it was self-proclaimed experts hocking snake oil and other cure-alls. Which means this is here to stay and the only way to deal with it, is figure out a real solution to making their noise irritating enough to be ignored, so we can turn our attention back to the experts in front of us… and look for catharsis where we can regarding these guys getting what they deserve for lying full time.

Which we can find on the internet, from reputable sources when they get burned, and through television. For now, and again, hucksters pay their devil’s due in fiction, as was the case in the next episode of Tales from the Darkside. A feat that ‘The Trouble with Mary Jane’ accomplishes, by introducing us to a pair of outright rotten hucksters named Nora and Jack Mills. Who are so terrible at life, they attempt to prey upon people’s fears of the unknown by posing as psychics that know how to handle the afterlife. Which seems to pay off in spades when they are offered fifty grand to perform an exorcism on a girl named Mary Jane. Which they see as nothing more than a chance to sucker a broken mom dealing with an emotionally unstable child. But soon they come to learn, this possession is legit, and they are now facing down forces they don’t understand. But for fifty grand, that won’t stop them from trying… and badly failing.

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Which does indeed lead to a satisfying episode. Because watching two ‘experts’ attempt to purge a demon they know nothing about, leads to some humbling moments for them. The kind that reminds us how far this kind of person will go to be proven right, and how dumb a lot of them truly are, and how their kind of idiotic perseverance causes more harm than good, and it most certainly does here. Since eventually, Nora and Jack basically screw the whole thing up and commit themselves to a life of evil servitude when the possession flips upon them, complete with two spirts, since their dumb ways awoke another one with minimal effort, and well… it is just great to watch a pair of doofuses pay the piper in this manner all because they were so desperate and eager to prove themselves as experts.
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But what also makes this episode worth our while, is the sheer fact that it wonderfully outlines why people like this exist. Since clearly, Nora and Jack are genuine failures in life and are so jaded by the world that didn’t embrace them, that they believe ripping it off is the only way to thrive. Which serves as a fascinating parallel to the hucksters we see now. Since they too are obviously desperate to be heard by the masses after being shunned by them or after failing miserably at being seen, and use online platforms to compensate, with damaging results. Which is an analysis that also offers a solution to the problem. In that, somehow, some way, we as a society have to figure out how to cherish what the experts have to say, so that the wannabes are silenced and disappear until they sadly, figure out a way to once again be heard, because they’re desperate to do so. 

But of course, finding a road to making that happen, is easier said than done. But… it is indeed an actual answer. One that comes forth via a truly entertaining episode. Because this is also, something of a send-up of The Exorcist, and it is quite satirical in nature. Which explains why Phyllis Diller is the lead here as Nora, since she was a comedic genius and of course… the demon sequences play into her hands, and all of that allows for the frustrations we feel about the ‘expert’ to never get too heavy and overwhelm, and of course… this episode helps to remind us to not let the hucksters get us down. Because eventually, karma will come calling. Until next time, try to enjoy the daylight.

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