"Tales from the Crypt" Retro Recap: "Split Personality"

Written by Scotty

It is easy to feel down on your luck, but even easier to help improve someone else’s.  With just a simple gesture, you can brighten someone’s day and make them feel like a million dollars.  Now if this is for your benefit, or the other person’s, that is the real question.  Some of the best con men around have this trait down and even though they do not ask for anything in return for a good deed, they are looking for the bigger score.  If you are able to tell that this is happening to you may be one of the reasons why people do not trust anyone, regardless if they are trying to help or not.

Jack is in love with money and he can never seem to get his hands on enough of it.  While sitting at the bar in a casino, he helps out a poor gambler that is about to be out of large sum of money that needs to be reserved for his son’s operation.  Jack is keeping track and tells the man to hit on nineteen when playing Blackjack and guarantees a two will come up.  Even though he is a stranger, the gambler hits and ends up winning a lump sum of money.  Jack does not want anything in return from the man when offered, but does offer the man a chance to invest in an up and coming business that will triple his money in no time.

Walking out with ten thousand dollars, Jack is even happier than before and puts his money to good use.  While finishing up with his call girl, Jack gets very nostalgic and tells her about the only love that he really has in his life, twins.  With his car breaking down in front of a large, eccentric house, Jack tries to get inside and use the phone.  Being greeted by April Blair who is pointing a gun as his head, Jack is amazed to see that she has a sister, a twin sister.  When June joins the commotion, Jack is able to fall back on his knowledge of the architect behind the ugly house's history.  With this being the young women’s father, Jack is in the game and will not end it, since the Blair sisters are filthy rich.

Getting the girls out of their seclusion, Jack has only one thing on his mind…the money.  Needing to find a way to separate the Blair’s from their inheritance, Jack comes up with a plan to woo them both and comes up with a killer lie that can make all of his dreams come true.  Pretending that he has a twin brother, Jack assumes both roles and is able to marry both of the woman.  Since he and his brother have to trade off duties overseas, they will never be seen together, but something that he should have paid attention to that the girls told him, they share everything.  Jack believes that everything is going fine in both of his marriages, but when he gets a closer look in a locked cabinet, he finds out what really happened to the twins father as he has chosen his own fate.

One person cannot always do it all and that I agree with.  Jack tries to string himself too thin in this episode, but he does not care since there is so much money on the line.  Wanting it all, he gets a little bit careless and that is what will cost him his fortune in the long run.  When the deal seems like it is too good, what should you do?  I say you should run for the hills, since nobody’s luck is ever that good.  Starring Joe Pesci as Jack, Jacqueline Citron as April Blair and Kristen Citron as June Blair, it is great to see two actual twin sisters get the role, no matter how demented it may seem.  Even though the thought and temptation is out there, one of the biggest fears I would have with dating twins is what if I cannot tell them apart.  It can prove to be very difficult!  Until next time kiddies, Stay Scared.

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