Nerds That Geek Movie Review: ‘Vampires’

Written by Scott Edwards

​Jack Crow and his crew are a no-nonsense group that are good at one thing and one thing only, killing vampires. After clearing a nest of the undead near Fort Union, not finding a Master vampire on the premises has left a bad taste in Crow’s mouth. But with another successful cleanup under their belts, the group returns to their hotel and celebrates with alcohol and women. Although the men may be considered spiritual and travel with a priest, they have no fear in their sinning ways. That is until a vampire, a master, crashes their party and kills almost everyone in the hotel with ease.

Running for their lives, Crow and his number one hunter Montoya are able to escape with working girl Katrina who has recently been bitten. The master vampire shares a link of what he is doing or seeing with someone that has been bitten and not yet turned. Crow knows this and will use it to his advantage on his quest for revenge against the evil beast. Directed to meet with his higher ups, Crow visits his old friend, Cardinal Alba, and receives news that his team is not the only one that has encountered this master. 

Jan Valek is a priest who led an uprising against the church. He was later captured, tried for heresy, and burned at the stake for his offense. He was later seen walking at night, and it had been reported that he was drinking the blood of the living, the first known case of vampirism. Being the first, Valek has super strength and is not able to be defeated by conventional means. Crow has his work cut out of for him, as he chases after the first vampire and tries to defeat Valek before he is able to locate an ancient relic that may allow him and his fellow vampires to walk in the sunlight.

Vampires is an old school vampire story, with no vampires trying to win your love, no dancing and no romance and most importantly, no sparkling. Jack Crow (James Woods) has been searching for this master, ever since his parents were killed by the strain. Teaming up with his longtime friend and top hunter, Anthony Montoya (Daniel Baldwin) and his newly assigned priest Father Adam Guiteau (Tim Guinee), Crow is ready to deal as much damage as possible to the one that has started it all. Not knowing who he can genuinely trust, Crow challenges his member’s loyalty to make sure they are on his side for the final showdown.

Vampires is the type of vampire movie you will love if you are not wanting the romance and sparkling that have been hitting the big screens over the past few years. Blood and guts fly across the screen as you watch an actual horror movie, being led by James Woods who delivers beautifully in this role as he tries to figure out how to survive and destroy the ancient plague. There are just great performances all around, along with good effects for the time. This is not Ghosts of Mars or Escape from L.A., Vampires is a bonafide horror movie that John Carpenter delivered well with. Although, any movie where vampires actually die in sunlight is just peachy with me. Stay Scared.

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