Nerds That Geek Movie Review: 'Critters 3'

Written by John Edward Betancourt

​I’ve come to learn through the years that we can more or less pinpoint precisely where our favorite film franchises went off of the proverbial rails. Because there is always in our minds, a particular movie where nothing quite felt the same, or looked the same and while we are watching that all important moment the first time around, something in the back of our brains let us know that this was likely the beginning of the end for this storied saga. 
 
It’s a shame really because in many ways, you start to say goodbye to the franchise in that moment and brace yourself for dark days ahead and oddly enough, I find that this happens more often in horror films than anywhere else since the next production team to pick up the mantle simply don’t understand what makes the franchise they’ve inherited special. Or, as sad as it may be, the series in question is simply out of fresh ideas to offer the audience and I would venture to say the latter of those issues is what brought about the beginning of the end for the Critters franchise since Critters 3 turned out to be such a disappointment.
 
Which really is a shame, because this motion picture had the potential to be something great. I mean come on, Crites turned loose in an isolated apartment building? That’s nightmare fuel and it should have made for a fascinating horror film that featured a slow burning mental breakdown of the good people that live in this place since their safety would have always come into question with the Crites lurking in the darkness, and the tension in this story should have revolved around those hungry little monsters slowly closing in on their prey.
 
But instead, we are left with a boring film through and through. Sure, there are Crites, sure they do their thing, but the moments of terror are so few and far between that the audience loses interest about half way through and not even the wonder of Charlie, who has always served as the hero and connective tissue of this story cannot save it from its own mistakes and its slow script and well, as you watch this one, you realize something has gone terribly wrong with the franchise because all of the magic of the first two films is simply nowhere to be found.
 
If anything, the only real awesome part about this film, is that it features the acting debut of someone you may or may not have heard of in Hollywood, some kid named Leonardo DiCaprio and well, Leo’s talent shines in this one since he is an acting machine but really that’s it. That’s the only highlight to talk about when it comes to this flick and that’s unfortunate and really, I think the fact that the powers that be wanted to make this a brooding horror film when the series has always had a touch of levity in it was the grand mistake here. When all is said and done however, if you’re a big time Leo fan, then definitely check this one out, otherwise, avoid it at all costs and watch the first two films instead…

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