Nerds That Geek Movie Review: 'Chopping Mall'

Written by John Edward Betancourt

​The beauty of horror is that the genre is open to experimentation. It can take its time to discover what truly terrifies us, or properly explore all the evils that we find in the world. Or it can just plain go wild and combine whatever elements it sees fit. You see it happening now. If you take a shark and an octopus you get a Sharktopus. Or if you take sharks and a tornado, you get a Sharknado.  

This combination of sub genres is nothing new in horror, in fact during the 1980's it was commonplace. Often times, these types of movies were quirky or just plain awful. But a few found a way to captivate us, including a film that managed to enhance the wonder of teen slasher flicks by throwing a few killer robots into the mix in 1986’s Chopping Mall.

The Park Plaza Mall prides itself on being state of the art, and when it comes to security they have spared no expense in adding automated doors that seal down the mall until dawn. But it doesn't end there, they have also added the Protector Series Robot to their team. These robots are designed to handle anyone who manages to get past the doors. They are a revolutionary step in security and to ensure no accidents they are able to distinguish employees from unwanted visitors with sticky fingers. But when a freak lightning storm alters their programming, the teenagers who stayed inside to party may find that their decision will cost them an arm and a leg.  

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​I watched this film for the first time when it hit home video back and the day and it instantly found its way into my heart. It is definitely one of those guilty pleasure films, but it is also a rarity because this is a film with a silly concept that plays everything as straight as an arrow...and it actually works. It doesn't matter how over the top or goofy it sounds that robots are killing horny teenagers in a mall, you don't question it nor do you roll your eyes while watching this motion picture.
 
It might help that its running time is short enough that you don't have time to question it, or it could be the surprisingly fair amount of gore in the film, or it could be the fact that the movie features some big-time horror legends. No joke. Scream queens Barbara Crampton and Kelli Maroney are in this. Cult favorites Paul Bartel and Mary Woronov make an appearance. Not to mention, film legend Dick Miller even finds his way into this wild tale.  

More than likely, it is all those things that make Chopping Mall an enjoyable B movie classic. There's laughs, maybe not bone chilling scares, but you'll hoot and holler when the time is right because this film just plain gets it and that alone makes it worth watching.  

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