Nerds That Geek Movie Review: ‘Assault of the Sasquatch’

Written by Scott Edwards

​Sometimes doing the right thing can lead to more problems than solutions. While nobody wants to see someone being wronged in any way, when they step in, they can be facing something that they were not prepared for. It is a conscious decision that a person has to make to either flat out avoid these situations or try and play the hero for someone in need. Just make sure you don’t always shy away from the challenge, because when you do and see that you could have been the person to save a life, you will regret it for the rest of yours.
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Out on the hunting reserve, Terry Drake and his crew are looking to bag a couple of bears while there is no one else around. Being able to get a couple of bear paws into the truck, they hear another illegal trap going off, but it has something much bigger inside. Shooting the creature with a tranq dart, Terry cannot believe what he has found, a Sasquatch. Loading it into the back of his truck, the monster wakes up and kills a member of his crew, but that is next to nothing as the payday of a lifetime is coming Terry’s way. Getting a call into his collector friend who will play big bucks for the find, Terry will have a change of plans as he is picked up by the local rangers for poaching off season.

Returning to his old precinct in the city with a prisoner in hand, Ryan Walker is shocked to see that it has become pretty much a ghost town. With just a skeleton crew working there, he is still able to get Terry booked into a holding cell until he can be transferred to the bigger station. Catching up with all of his old friends, Ryan gives his daughter a call to come to the station to meet him, but there is something brewing in the back of the truck that is looking to take revenge for its previous day’s torment that nobody can see coming. 

Waking from its slumber, the Sasquatch is able to break out of the truck and takes a look around at its new surroundings. Finding that women like to get undressed in front of open windows here, the Sasquatch seems to really enjoy where it has been moved to, but also knows it needs to say hidden in the shadows as it could still be hunted. Moving through the city during the dead of night, the Sasquatch keeps a keen eye on the police station to make sure that nobody is able to enter or exit until it is able to exact its revenge on the man that brought him there. As the night moves on and the body count continues to rise, the Sasquatch has laid claim to its prey and will not stop its hunt until Terry becomes another one of its trophies.

I am always a sucker when it comes to Bigfoot movies, especially when it only wants to destroy everything in its path. As Terry is only using tranquilizer darts to keep the beast sedated to monetize his prize, not keeping the Sasquatch knocked out is deadly for everyone involved. I liked the crew inside of the old police station, especially Amy who really stole the show with her know how of keeping herself and the others safe from the wrath of the Sasquatch. With a poacher, some dead bodies, blood splatter, some knives, a lack of guns, a side-tracked storyline that actually pays off and a perverted Sasquatch, it is just a fun movie to get lost in. While I don’t know if it would be a good idea to bring a Bigfoot into a populated area, I would like to know what the beast has against dogs, I mean, come on, dogs are awesome and should be petted, not squashed. Stay Scared.

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