"Once Upon a Time" Recap: "Heart of Gold"

Written by Shae

THIS IS THE EMERGENCY SPOILER ALERT SYSTEM...YOU ARE ADVISED TO READ AT YOUR OWN RISK...

Watching this at work was probably the wrong thing to do, since I literally just had to cover my mouth and scream. Holy weasel biscuits you guys! This episode! Seriously! What did we just watch!? What happened??? I'm sitting here like 13 kinds of both amazed, stunned, and angry! So many emotions going on at once, can't be a good thing. Like, okay. Let's just sit down and talk for a moment. Right, Emma is still violently pissed off at her parents for lying to her. Who can blame her? They do admit to knowing the author, and blame him for going down this path. Emma has a few good points, however, that nothing was worth forsaking another soul over. It's a sad truth...our author, Walt, is busy running away when he stumbles into Gold, who convinces our stupid author to come with him. Because, manipulative reasons. So they vanish, and that plot point gets put on hold while Regina wakes up and Gold has a chat with her.

So, we have Robin and we have Marian and they have Roland, and it's all dandy. He chose to go with her, because Marian is his wife. He's been struggling since the beginning with all his life choices over love and what not. Because, the heart is fickle, and fate is a thing, and all this leads up to Robin leaving with Marian and Roland. But what about Regina? She matters too! Of course she does. Robin can't get over her. His once true love and his now true love existing at the same time is just too much. How did this all even happen? In the past we see Robin and Marian running a tavern together, but the Sheriff of Douchery is demanding money Robin doesn't have. A deal is struck. 

Rumple will give him the money, in exchange for a potion that can mend any heart. This potion is in Oz...Robin agrees and goes! We get to meet Will. Zelena is awful...and Robin makes a choice to give the stollen potion to Will instead of Rumple after sad story times. Cool, right? Now, I did not actually watch the 3rd season. I'm sure this makes me a bad person, but listen, it happens. Sometimes you just need to take a break from a show. I'm slowly working on getting better at it, but it happens. I figured out that Gold kills Zelena once he finds out she killed his son. Annnddd from this moment on, the shock of what happened next...wellll. I'm still wanting to yell.

When Gold was pushed out of Storybrooke, before he found Ursula, he went to Neal's old apartment. Which was given to Robin and his family by Regina. Gold suffers a heart attack in front of them, and gets Robin to steal this magical potion that can still cure hearts from a store. However, the potion he drinks isn't the one he asked for, but cold medicine. Marian switched the vials, because she wants him dead. Okay, totally out of character from what we've seen all episode! And then, then, she changes. Marian isn't Marian. Marian is Zelena. And Zelena wants Regina to never have her happy ending. It doesn't matter how she does it, she just wants that to happen. It's Zelena who killed Marian and took her form. She's stowed away with Emma and Hook into the past. Only to kill Marian and become her....she tells Gold about the Author, and they have a deal. She'll give him the potion for her happy ending. All this time we were being deceived. In the end, in present day, Gold gives Regina Robin's number. Zelena answers and....well...that goes bad. And it gets worse. Gold tells Regina he can have Robin killed if she doesn't help turn Emma's heart dark. And that's how it ends.

Guys! What even right now! I'm both shocked and angry!!!! I said that before, but it hasn't changed! I can't wait a whole week for more!!!  Sadly, we have to...

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