‘Lodge 49’ Rewatch: A Gentle and Unfortunate Nudge

Written by John Edward Betancourt 

How ‘Corpus’ Reminds Us to Not Rush the Grieving Process 

‘Look, w-what I’m trying to say is that we don’t need to do all this. We don’t need to say goodbye, because my dad’s still here. So… thanks for coming out.’
- Sean ‘Dud’ Dudley 

​When someone in our lives passes away, there’s quite the structured checklist that we have to go through. We have to alert family and friends about their passing, and we need to cry and cry hard, so we can get some of the pain out of our systems before the real work gets underway. For our next steps include preparing the memorial service for our loved ones or booking flights and rental cars if we are the ones who received the bad news and need to make our way across the country to pay our respects post haste. And this hectic and important dash to get everything done comes to a crescendo when we bid our final tearful farewells to the one we lost, and celebrate their life in somber and beautiful fashion.
 
But what we rarely think about past that point, is the work that comes after we have said farewell. For losing a loved one can be a powerfully traumatic experience and everyone deals with that grief in their own unique way. Some of us, are devastated by the loss, and struggle to function because the person in question meant so much to us and influenced us in ways we didn’t realize until their passing. While others, suffer but recover, and some people are able to process their loss in quick and seemingly painless fashion. But while everyone has their own way to deal with this particular pain, there is unfortunately a strange stigma that surrounds the grieving process, in that; it should have a specific expiration date.
 
For so many believe that at some point, we simply must let go of our pain and move on and if we are unable to do so, then someone needs to push us in the right direction so we can stop ‘moping around’ and well, the folks that think this are horribly wrong. Because everyone heals at a different rate both emotionally and physically and pushing others to reach a nonexistent finish line, can in fact be quite the disaster. And really, all of this is on my mind today because every single thing we’ve just discussed is relevant to the next episode of Lodge 49. Because ‘Corpus’ unfortunately saw Liz make a bold decision to hold a memorial service for her father, all in the hopes of getting her brother to let go of their dad and move on in life. 

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​Which is, a kind gesture. One that genuinely shows us how much Liz cares for her twin brother and how much she wants to see him begin to emerge from the funk. Yet while her decision is rooted in nobility and good intentions, and one cannot fault her for trying to do something positive; the end result of how Dud handled this is what hammered home the lesson in question. Because Dud basically told a church full of people that he didn’t believe his father was gone from his side in the slightest, instead declaring that through alchemy’s teachings, that other worlds allowed for him to live on. And while this definitely played out in hilarious fashion, because no one was expecting Dud to declare his joy over an erection at a wake, the power of this moment in regard to the message is powerful to say the least.
 
For this teaches us, that it is up to the individual to figure out how to let go, and understand that the person they love isn’t coming back and that the only way to honor them is do them proud and hang onto their memory by sharing the wonder of their life when appropriate. But there is no blueprint as to how a person gets there. Sometimes they have to get lost to find the right path, or they need some form of faith to spark a light within. Or sometimes burying one’s self in fruitless endeavors, the kind that seem to bring us safety and stability, help us to realize we are running from our pain and Dud did all of those things this tale. For he rejected the wake from the get-go, hoping to get lost in other moments instead of having to deal with it. And of course, the Lodge represents the faith aspect since he is using it to find that proverbial spark, and the whole tentative romance with Gloria the HR lady speaks to those hollow pursuits.
 
If anything, this was just… a sobering rewatch of this brilliant show. Because so many of us, myself included, have been in Dud’s shoes, where we want the pain to stop and lose ourselves in our own special way to make that happen. And what I truly appreciated about this tale, is how it never once judged Dud or looked down upon the unique path we walk to heal. It just reminded us that coming back from the darkness is a damn hard process. One where we definitely stumble and fall before stepping into the light. Plus, this episode also reminds us that these mistakes are necessary. Because failure teaches us the greatest lessons out there and perhaps the best surprise in this tale, is that it manages to be so incredibly uplifting. Because the support that Dud gets from his sister and his friends, reminds us that we are never alone on this painful journey, and those that care about us will be there to pick us up when we are down, as evidenced by Ernie’s talk with Dud at the Lodge after the service. And in the end, I really cannot get over the sheer beauty of this show, and how it does such a masterful job of showing us the highs and the lows of life, and it only motivates me further to press on and enjoy a second round of healing from a series that was way ahead of its time. Until next time. 

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