I will admit, famous people have got it hard. Needing to have so many people in their lives to take care of the little things while they try to further their careers, they have to have the right people in place to do so. One of the most important jobs out there, besides an agent would have to be a personal manager, someone that can take care of everything else, even decisions on what you should do next. You might know what should be your next step, but it never hurts to have a second pair of eyes to try and help get it right.

Strolling down the street in Los Angeles is nothing new to Sandy Wexler and bumping into stars is one thing that he cherishes, mainly because he might have the ability to add them to his brand. Sandy is a talent manager with an ever growing roster, but he has one problem that will never go away, he refuses to tell the truth. He flat out lies to his clients about what he is doing, who he is talking to and what opportunities could possibly await them. Back tracking on his statements within seconds of making them does not sit well with his group, however he is able to get minimal results, so they continue to come back for more.

Keeping his eyes and ears open at Magic Mountain, Sandy hears a young woman singing as though an angel gave birth to her and makes sure she knows it. Being able to convince young Courtney Clarke to sign with him, Sandy has managed to find the star on his roster, but she means much more to him than just that. While his head is stuck in the clouds, Sandy starts to let his business fumble a bit while Courtney’s career skyrockets and he is not willing to accept it. He eventually decides that Courtney would be far better off without him as a manager and goes back to his other clients that have put him on the map.

As the years pass and Courtney continues to date the industry's elite, Sandy is satisfied with his decisions and is starting to make some things happen for his new clients. But getting a call that one of his clients is being hounded by the paparazzi and is in no shape to face them, he jumps on it and finds that Courtney is right back in his life once more. With a chipper attitude, Sandy plays his game once again, yet, he is not willing to express what he really needs out of life. Putting his clients in the best position to succeed has made them happy, but when Sandy is down, he lets the business suffer and loses them all. Needing to find the one thing that will make him happy again, Sandy gets a life lesson from an unlikely source that opens his eyes to the real world and how things really work, but will that be enough?

You can put The Do-Over and The Ridiculous Six in your rearview mirror as you watch this movie, but it is still missing something that the Sandler films have not been able to find on Netflix, knee slapping laughs. It is more of a movie that is a get together with old friends that has a script attached to it. While the previous two movies were terrible and make Pixels look like an Oscar worthy film, this one is more nostalgic for the youth that grew up in the 90’s. With a slew of dated jokes that not everybody will get (dang I miss The Arsenio Hall Show), it is apparent that Sandy is not open to the times that are a changin' when giving advice, but I am sure none of us were when the 2000’s came barreling in. Loved the music and the cameos of some of my favorite stars from the 90’s, especially Aaron Neville, who is still a beast. I didn’t hate it, but the story really did not have any redeeming value to it, at least not enough to make the ending what it was, but hey, it is a movie and everyone loves a happy ending. Well, that is the end of the Sandler contract on Netflix right? Nope, he just got signed on for four more, so I guess we can continue to watch a marginal product on our small screens for years to come, thanks Netflix.

I have a couple favorite months throughout the year, but the month of April has a special spot in my heart as Cage-pril is what comes to mind. I have never shied away from events and I believe that this one should be celebrated by honoring our favorite Nicolas Cage moments from history. Wanting to figure out what the best way of grading his movies and trying to have them face off (no Cage movie reference intended), I have built a Nicolas Cage movie bracket of the roles which Nicolas Cage has excelled in over the years and even some more recent ones that caught my eye.  So without further ado, here is Nerds That Geek's first ever Cage-pril movie event, round of 16!

Face/Off vs. Ghost Rider
In the showdown between two iconic Cage movies, we have Castor Troy staring into the eyes of Johnny Blaze. While Johnny Blaze is able to come back from death as the Ghost Rider, Castor Troy is forced to embody his true evil and nemesis, Sean Archer. While both characters are tormented throughout their roles, it is hard to even compare what it would be like to kill off your old family to prove who you are and the psychopath Castor Troy is able to do just that…Face/Off Advances.

It Could Happen to You vs. National Treasure
In this standoff, Nicolas Cage is a hopeless romantic and which story tugs at your heart harder? A policeman that promises to split the winnings of his lottery ticket with a waitress or a treasure hunter that finds love and the greatest treasure of all time? While you get the same looks from Nic Cage throughout both movies, this battle comes down to the supporting cast and while I love Isaac Hayes in It Could Happen to You, he does not bring enough to the screen as Jon Voight, Harvey Keitel and Christopher Plummer are all legends of the silver screen.  National Treasure Advances.

The Rock vs. The Wicker Man
Two government employees square off in these Cage iconic roles, one Sheriff and a government chemist. While each are thrown into situations where nothing will go right, Stanley Goodspeed is forced to infiltrate Alcatraz while trying to evade a regiment of rogue soldiers, while Sheriff Edward Malus is trying to help and impress his ex-fiancee by finding out what is happening on the island of Summerisle. While The Wicker Man is a remake, Nic Cage does shine in the role, but his allergy to bees is nothing in comparison to VX gas and saving San Francisco from certain doom.  The Rock Advances.

Drive Angry vs. Gone in 60 Seconds
Two Nicolas Cage driving movies are looking to race to the finish, while Drive Angry has Milton coming back from Hell to get his granddaughter out of trouble, Gone in 60 Seconds has Memphis Raines coming back out of retirement to steal cars to keep his little brother Kip from being killed. With plenty of action and gun play in Drive Angry, it can be also be seen as a redemption type of movie that proves that love will conquer all, but it is missing some of the levity that Gone in 60 Seconds brings. With plenty of racing around in cars in both movies, it simply comes down to one thing, War’s 'Low Rider' playing at least once during the movie.  Gone in 60 Seconds Advances.

Matchstick Men vs. Guarding Tess
With his true Cage strength, Nicolas Cage has settled in for two roles that equally tug at your heart strings. Matchstick Men has grown on me over the years as Roy Waller tries to make amends to his illegitimate daughter who winds up coning him in the end. Guarding Tess gives you plenty of comedy but when push comes to shove and Secret Service Agent Doug is forced to put his life on the line for the former first lady, you can just pull out the tissues, because it just messes you up. With great supporting casts in both movies, it is hard to take away from what Shirley MacLaine brought to her character in Guarding Tess and the hatred that Doug/Nic Cage had for his job after being put on her staff full time.  Guarding Tess Advances.

Honeymoon in Vegas vs. U.S.S. Indianapolis: Men of Courage
I must admit that Honeymoon in Vegas was one of my favorite movies growing up, it was fun, silly and something that was just too good to be true. The opposite can be said when you talk about U.S.S. Indianapolis, as you are looking at more of documentary type of movie that highlights what happened to a ship that was left for dead by the government. While trying to make up for his outstanding debt in Vegas, young Jack Singer allows his fiancee at the time to be whisked away by millionaire Tommy  Korman who has eyes only for her, while on a sinking ship, Captain McVay is forced to sit idly by as he and his men are not only succumbing to the elements, but the sharks surrounding them that are having a feeding frenzy. Just because it has sharks, U.S.S. Indianapolis Advances.

Raising Arizona vs. Con Air
Two convicts at their best in this Cage showdown, as H.I. McDonnough and Cameron Poe are both looking for some sort of redemption in their own ways. H.I. McDonnough and his wife Edwina discover that they are not able to have children and a furniture tycoon has eight newborns, so what better way to get a kid than taking one? Cameron Poe on the other hand has killed a man while protecting his wife and has served his time and is ready to go home when his transport plane has been hijacked by his fellow inmates and he must try to do everything in his power to keep the passengers, criminals or not, safe. While both movies are absolutely crazy on their own merits, the thought that a convict would be willing to risk his own life and freedom to protect others is just too much to let go of.  Con Air Advances.

Lord of War vs. Pay the Ghost
In the final Cage Off of the round, Mike Lawford and Yuri Orlov go head to head with their poor decision making over the years. While Yuri Orlov from Lord of War is living an alternate life than what his wife believes, he is making millions on the illegal gun trade, while Mike Lawford from Pay the Ghost is living in seclusion after losing his son at a Halloween carnival. Not willing to let his life proceed and losing his marriage over the loss of their son, Mike starts to get signs that his son might still be alive and somewhere, but will have to trust his instincts and strangers to get him back. On the other side of things, Yuri has faith in his business and is not willing to give it up, even if it means keeping his marriage safe and secure from outsiders, especially his brother who has no idea what he wants to do with his life. A search that leads him into the underground and lost children from the city, Mike is no match for Yuri who will surely die doing what he does best.  Lord of War Advances. 

There you have it, the round of sixteen has come to an end with a few surprises on the table. I never thought Guarding Tess would make it past the first round, but did its job effectively, so we will have to wait and see how far it goes. The criteria will change for the next round, as favorite quotes will come into play, along with some other strange factors. Feel free to play along and hope that our favorite Nicolas Cage film can go all the way for this will be a Cage-pril for the ages. If you want, drop us a line on why your favorite Nicolas Cage movie should advance, since it is about to become a free for all and all bets are off of the table.  Happy CAGE-PRIL!!!

Smurfs: The Lost Village. Also known as Columbia/Sony’s attempt to turn The Smurfs into a film franchise, Take 3…

So, unless you’ve understandably blocked it from your memory, Sony got their hands on the Smurfs franchise in 2011, with the release of The Smurfs, an immediate cash-in on the format created by 20th Century Fox’s lucrative Alvin and the Chipmunks franchise. The perceived concept was to take an animated cartoon from the 80’s, turn it CG, shoehorn it into a live action, modern day landscape, and send the cutsey kid’s characters on an adventure in audacity with a perfectly harmless lead actor (Neil Patrick Harris in these films) as the tour guide.

It worked well using Chipmunks because, despite the whole thing about CG, and live action, the premise wasn’t all too different. It failed spectacularly by using the Smurfs, though, because their bag was mostly about creating cutesy kid-friendly fantasy. Take them out of that environment, and you have generic blue elves romping around New York, being chased around by a prosthetic-faced Hank Azaria. It didn’t help the fact that the CG for the Smurfs was so ugly, it somehow triggered the uncanny valley for…short topless drowning victims, I guess.

Plans for this sequel were made public around 2014, when Sony started sending out in-production trailers of the film to news sites. They wanted to convey the message that this film was going to be as close to the memory of the original cartoon and comics as possible, and featured interviews with various animators gushing about fond memories of the Smurfs while showing off mounds of hand drawn artwork. Of course, this was still during a time when Sony pictures appeared to be a breakout star of the already crowded animated feature landscape. Pretty soon they’d hit a rock in the rapids when they’d announced the cancellation of a promising film featuring Popeye, and the falling out from that resulted in the resignation of Hotel Transylvania director Gennedy Tartakovsky, leaving us with only this film, and an upcoming film starring Emojis, to be the only ones that Sony Pictures Animation will be gracing us with in 2017.

So after all this is said and done, did Smurfs: The Lost Village succeed in smurfing us the nostalgic smurf we’ve smurfed for all this smurf? It does, but not very smurfily.

The movie assumes you know your Smurf-lore, if even to the extent it was used in the live action films. It centers on Smurfette, a character who was created from a ball of clay by Gargamel as a means to sabotage the Smurf Village. The Smurfs, having originated from a Belgium comic from the 60's, of course follows a group of three-apple tall blue elves who each possess a single definable trait, and, as a product of those times 'woman' just happened to be one of those traits. This film, like every other form of Smurf-product that moved forward from those times, tries to rectify this narrow-minded viewpoint by making Smurfette the most versatile character in the picture.

Here, she seems to be a jack of all trades, but feels remorseful that, unlike the other Smurfs, she doesn’t have just one particular thing that defines her. Add into that, the fact that the evil wizard Gargamel still perceives her as ‘doing her job’ in regards to foiling the other Smurfs, and you quickly realize her overall plight. This all changes one day when she sees another Smurf make a dash through a hole in an inexplicable wall in the middle of the woods. Against Papa Smurf’s wishes, she mounts an expedition into the forbidden forest, with the core group of high-profile Smurfs, Hefty, Brainy, and Clumsy, along for the ride. 

Here it is assumed, once again from the live action movies, that we understand this is the core group of Smurfs, called 'Team Smurf' by Hefty. The obvious problem to this was that Hefty was barely in those films, replaced by a Scottish kilted stereotype named Gutsy. A few especially slapstick dashes through several enchanted set pieces, and the group finally finds themselves at The Lost Village, that turns out to be completely female, in contrast to the all-male village that we know from the series in general. They have come to warn the denizens about Gargamel, which obviously leads Gargamel directly to the village. There’s a third-act rescue, annnnnd….that’s about the entire film.

The one thing you have to keep in mind is that, unlike those live action predecessors, this film is doing the best it can to stick to its target demographic. There’s little, if any, nostalgic or parental bonuses to this film. It’s The Smurfs, as pure as the execution will allow. Still, even to that effect, there are a few strange choices made in this film. We only get this core group, Papa Smurf, and the new female Smurf villagers throughout. There’s only one throwaway line in 'smurf talk,' and Gargamel (Rainn Wilson) is noticeably more silly and slapstick, with a candor that more resembles a Will Ferrell character than the character he was in either of the live action movies.

The voice casting, once again, tries to be reminiscent of the live-action films, despite the use of all new actors. Mandy Patinkin (Papa Smurf), Demi Lovato (Smurfette), and Danny Pudi (Brainy Smurf), play the roles vacated by the late Jonathan Winters, Katy Perry, and Fred Armisen, and do so in a way that doesn’t stray from how they were done in that original film. It’s good then that a mass of the lines were passed to Hefty (Joe Manganiello), and Clumsy (Jack McBrayer). The true celebrity voice casting is on the Smurfs of the lost village, which boasts names like Julia Roberts as Smurf Willow, the matriarch/female equivalent to Papa Smurf, Michelle Rodriguez as Smurf Storm, the brave warrior, and Ellie Kemper as the Pinkie Pie-esque Smurf Blossom. Meghan Trainor is in there somewhere as well, but more notably she performs an especially 'girl-power' anthem for the final scene of the film. The stand-out, at least in the minds of the parents in the audience, is that Gargamel’s cat Azreal is once again being voiced by veteran VA Frank Welker, with other animal effects handled by American Dad’s Dee Bradley Baker.

The animation looks good; at all times appearing to be just below the line of any CG film this side of Disney or Pixar. The characters both look and act cartoony, often warping and blurring like hand-drawn characters do. It doesn’t give the all-out masquerading-as-cell animation that Hotel Transylvania did, but it is consistent and wonderful to look at.

Sadly, the effort put into this movie to distinguish it from the originals really shows, and this is a film more akin to the Smurfs as we know them. The drawback is that this movie doesn’t do anything else to make it especially memorable. By all means, see it as a fan of the Smurfs, and bring the kids. They’re the ones who are going to enjoy it the most. 

One of the things that I do love hearing about, are alien abduction stories. Now I know that some of them are purely made up, while some are just stories that crazy people tell, but I am sure that there could be a little bit of truth out there as well, at least I hope. I have never been one to be afraid of what the stars have in store for us, I actually welcome it if there are other creatures roaming the universe looking to make contact. Even if they are hostile, it would prove so many people right when it comes to their doubters and it would also prove that we are not alone in the universe.

Needing a project to do his thesis on, psychologist-in-training Joshua has chosen to do it on his girlfriend Mia who has a story to tell. Believing that she witnessed her mother being taken away by aliens twenty years ago, she battles through bouts of depression that Joshua thinks he can help cure. Coming up with a plan to take Mia back to the scene of the crime, where she has not been since being put into foster care days after the abduction, some closure may help her to become the woman she usually is. With camera in hand and approval to shoot everything that he can see, Joshua sees an opportunity to get help get her mind right for the rest of their days.

Traveling to Mia’s old home town in New Mexico where UFO sightings are not at all unusual, the couple meets with Detective Romero to get answers about Mia’s mother’s missing person case. With the case never being solved, but leads that point to the woman running away with another lover, Romero is not open to anything else. Blasting Mia for believing that aliens were involved, Joshua sees that Mia is not willing to accept any other answer than what she believes she witnessed twenty years ago. Hitting the road again and finding the spot where her mother was abducted, Mia feels closer to her mother now than ever and wants to take some time to reflect on her loss, along with how much she really misses her.

With the sun fading in the sky, the couple head back to the car, but the hybrid will not start. With no cell phone reception, the couple decide to try and hike their way back to town, but when the calls of the animals in the desert get to be too much for them, they decide to return to the car, which is no longer there. Heading over to an abandoned complex and having the life frightened out of them by a local, the couple tries to give chase and wind up finding their car right where they left it. As the car will still not start, a bright light appears out in front of the car and Mia now knows for sure that the aliens are trying to pick her up. Joshua however does not believe what he has just seen, but for the sake of giving his love a fair shot, he decides to talk to the locals about their beliefs in UFOs and aliens. But the hunt does not stop there as the couple locate a local guru with a much more sinister outlook about what is happening in the area, along with who might be watching them.

I find myself saying that I want an alien movie more often than not these days, and this one has helped fill the void for me. Even though the film doesn't feature the invaders that we are accustomed to, we get to see a woman prove to the world that she is right and was not lying about what happened to her mother so many years before. Seeing Mia’s story is heartbreaking as more of it unlocks and while she seems to be a well-adjusted adult, nothing will take away the love she had for her mother. Although Joshua is cynical about the entire abduction story and wants his girlfriend to get closure, he is willing to go along with the whole thing, but like most men, winds up saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. The two characters play off of each other very well and while there will be fights and hurt feelings, there is nothing that will keep them from each other. With possible cover ups, watchers, aliens and a character named Crazy Pete, it is a fun watch for those of you that believe and those of you that don’t. 

The original 1995 anime feature film version of Ghost in the Shell is remembered as a cinematic achievement, and for many good reasons. Alongside Ninja Scroll and Akira, it was one of the first films to make Japanese anime a viable property in places other than its nation of origin. It is a police drama with a female lead, whose circumstances and agency have nothing to do with the fact that she is a woman. It changed the identity of the cyberpunk genre, taking it from the realms of films like Blade Runner and Total Recall, and inspiring films like The Fifth Element, The Matrix, and Lucy, a recent movie starring this film’s lead actress, Scarlett Johansson.
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But perhaps the most important thing that the original film brings to the cinematic table is that it is a perfect study of 'show, don’t tell,' environment based storytelling. The film itself is only an hour long, and merely illustrates a caseload taken on by Chief Taramaki of section 9, a division of the prime minister’s police force which specializes in crimes related to the hacking of cybernetic brains that are now possessed by 50% of the population. After an incident involving a civilian driving a garbage truck, they learn that the hacking is the responsibility of an entity known as 'The Puppet Master,' who is revealed as an artificial intelligence released by the American military under the codename 'Project 2501.'

All this is filtered through the perspective of its lead, Makoto Kusanagi, who is 100% mechanical, except for her 'ghost,' a trade-name for the human soul in this continuity. She doesn’t remember anything about her past, but puts those emotions completely aside so she can efficiently do her work as the lead of Division 9’s task force. She is a human, wearing the mask of a cyborg, hiding behind the mask of her title, often being referred to as just 'The Major.' Her link to her human emotions is often severed. She rarely even speaks except to her confidant, the still-mostly human Sergeant Batou. When it is revealed that The Puppet Master is unprecedentedly an A.I. that has gained its own 'ghost,' or human sentience, Makoto sees within it an opportunity to answer some of her own existential questions, and in the third act of the film, offers to merge data with the entity, for no other reason than it would give her unique breed of mankind a bid at evolution.

In the span of this single anime-illustrated police investigation, the film uses its domestic themes to ask a whole intro to psychology’s-class worth of questions, making it at both times a basic and standout representation of the cyberpunk genre it brought further to the mainstream. This immediately makes the prospect of an American live-action remake of the film disconcerting. Modern day Hollywood is not exactly known for its subtlety. Its final iteration and release was pumped forward to 2017 over the usual concerns: specifically that an American movie based on an anime property did not have Asian actors in the film’s lead roles. The re-make furthers the confusion by actually being a Chinese co-production, with Dreamworks and director Avi Arad splitting its responsibilities with the Shanghai Film Group Corporation.

If only that were the only way this film tried to confuse that issue. Johansson’s version of The Major actually begins her film life with an American name: Mira Killian. Rest assured this is the same character, and her identity as Mokoto Kusanagi is revealed in exactly the way you would expect. The writers obviously intended this as a way to add the audience to the mystique of their casting decision, but it only comes off as adding insult to injury towards that issue. She is once again involved with an investigation into Project 2571, which takes the more direct narrative path of revealing The Major as the last successful experiment in an illegal operation conducted by Hanka Robotics CEO Cutter (Peter Ferinando). This project stole the ghosts from several runaway teens, and gave them new identities and false memories to cover up their own unethical practice. The Major frequently diverges from her Section 9 work, towards the concern of Batou (Pilou Asbaek), to continue to hack into and engage with a ghost revealed to be a remnant of the experiment named Hideo Kuze (Michael Pitt), who shambles around in a mostly broken shell.
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The film does everything it can to link it to the original film. It makes a point to insert iconic scenes like the previously mentioned garbage truck scene, a scene involving The Major and Batou on a boat, and the third act battle with a mechanical spider mech. An actual good casting decision was made on behalf of the film’s origins, as legendary Japanese character actor 'Beat' Takeshi is in the role of Chief Aramaki, who speaks only in Japanese, and plays his part with an intrigue that ironically succeeds in making him an interesting character without too much dialogue. The cyber-Tokyo portrayed in the trailers is purveying through the film, which is admittedly a fantastic visual, despite the fact it takes away from the more humble, rustic landscape of the anime original.

Ultimately, however, the success of any installment of this franchise hangs upon the characterization of the Major. The first thing you’d notice about Johansson in the role is that her acting is plain-faced and wooden throughout. This in itself isn’t a deal breaker, as the character of Major Kusanagi can be like that at times. The film even went out of its way to take themes from the larger Ghost mythos to fill in her part, like a scene where The Major visits a brothel, simply to touch another woman’s face for tactile feedback. What’s missing from the equation though, is the character’s innate motivation. The anime version of the Major is a soldier first, a woman second, and a ghost third. Johansson’s version is far too occupied with discovering her origin to convey the same level of strength. There’s enough in the movie as a whole to allow the viewer to immerse and connect with this version of the character, but there’s not enough inside the internals of this film to allow the same level of appreciation for her struggle.

This movie isn’t worth watching. I’m sure a lot of people will walk into this movie without knowing about its source material and be pleased, if a little confused, with the self-contained world it conveys. However, this version of Ghost in the Shell ultimately fails because it doesn’t do anything to add to a universe that both already exists and handles its very deep and compelling themes in a way that is not only good, but absolutely perfect. You could stand to have just a little anime in your life. Skip this and watch the originals.