What Causes Crazy Weather, According to Scotty

Written by Scott Edwards

Out here in Colorado, we are known for having some interesting weather patterns now and then. How does the saying go out here?  If you don’t like the weather, just give it fifteen minutes and it will change, and this is the season when random storms appear out of the blue, complete with lightning and hail. It is like someone is trying to open the Ark of the Covenant and I need to pin down the reason behind this crazy weather. So here is my list of possible causes behind the lightning and hopefully we can appease the weather gods before these storms start hitting in the middle of the night.

Alien Invasion 
Yes, I know that there are a lot of doubters out there that think that we are all alone, but how could you explain such a weather shift. Now, why would I think this could be aliens you may ask, with their advanced technology, they could all be circling around in their space crafts on one set trajectory forcing the jet streams to shift lower than they have been in ages. That is one thought while the other can be more out of a movie and the little green men could be traveling to the surface of the planet in the lightning itself. You see this in the remake of War of the Worlds and for the most part I think this is kind of foolish, but when some of the rumbling from the thunder does not dissipate within thirty seconds, it could be the engine of an old space craft hidden beneath the surface starting up again.
 
The Ark of the Covenant 
This may not be as far-fetched as it sounds since we have plenty of paleontologists that live in the state that are always digging to find the secrets that the creatures of our past left behind. Why would I put this on the paleontologists rather than the archaeologists you may ask? Well it is simple. There is plenty of human history in our state when it comes to the old west and who roamed the plains before the centennial state was founded, but we have more dinosaur dig sites out here than anything else. So, if a paleontologist did happen to come across an old artifact like the Ark of the Covenant while performing their dig, do you think that they would wait to see what is inside by calling someone else in, or would they try to open it themselves? I would try to open it, since it is my find and even though I know that to be the wrong answer, I know plenty of people that would treat it the same way. Why in Colorado you may ask? It is as good of place as any and since nobody knows where it has been hidden, Colorado may just be far enough off of the radar that it could be hidden deep inside the mountains.

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​Cult Activity 
With all of the horror movies I have watched, I know there is something to all of the chanting to bring someone or something back from the depths and there always seems to be a storm that arrives when doing it. There could be a person or a group that has stumbled upon an ancient text that is trying to resurrect someone from the ground. As the chanting begins and the skies open up, there might be an evil coming back to our planet and the lightening is a signal to run for the hills. Why else would the storms be consistently coming out of nowhere at the same time every night? 3 a.m. is commonly known as The Witching Hour, so maybe the person or the group is trying to capitalize on the this and use the spirits to their advantage when beginning their activities. But the hour is off since the storms are hitting an hour earlier, maybe they are on Central Time rather than Mountain Time.
 
An Unfinished Ritual
With the history of the state, it is not too unusual to reference a rain dance being done. While this is something that most people see on television, if you ever get to witness it in person, it will change your life. Now I am not a dancer and it would not appease the spirits above to see me dance, I fall more on the farmer’s rituals.  Looking to make a good harvest, it is not uncommon for the superstitious farmer (or farmers) to give something up to the spirits. Offering a sacrifice for a good harvest may seem like something strange, but if it works, there is no reason to stop. This is more of my speed and I have met some of these individuals in my time and even though they seem to be different, they still have a good point and when the farm is thriving, there is no way to discount their methods. But when the promise is made and not delivered on, the spirits do get upset and most of the time just kill all the crops on their farm, but if they feel like they are being made fun of, well all bets are off and the clouds open up and release their wrath on the farm and surrounding areas. There is only one way to appease these spirits and that s to give them what was promised and until this is done, they do not back off no matter who or what is in their way.

There you have it, my reasons behind the crazy lightning storms that have suddenly moved in. It could just be a shift in the weather patterns, but what fun would that be, since there is always a better explanation out there, or at least one that is more entertaining. Make sure to take cover when these storms are moving through your areas since lightning strikes are nothing to mess around with. Even if you are safely in your home, you can feel the electricity from them, especially if they hit the sidewalk outside of your house. It is possible to survive a lightning strike, but the ones that have, would not ever encourage trying it.  

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