Scotty’s Zombie Apocalypse Survival Plan

Written by Scott Edwards

I know with all of the shows, television series and comics out there, we should all be ready for the zombie apocalypse, but are you really? Even if it is not the apocalypse, maybe just the country running out of gasoline or something just as scary, are you ready for the madness on the streets? You never know how people will react until the event really happens and although some of our mediums have shown us what they think will happen, you never really know and need to be prepared. So, I am going to hit up on the Zombie Apocalypse and what a good plan would be, at least for me.

Living in the Midwest, it is easy to get caught up in the beautiful views out here and that could be one of my primary saviors. With the mountains just a jump out the window, they would be my first option. Packing up all of the canned food I can find, I would get on the road and head for higher ground. Now the winters out here have not been too bad in the city, but the mountains continuously get pounded with snow and I know that would be a major deterrent to the zombies trying to get a bite of me.

What would I do when I got to the mountains you would ask? Until I was able to find an out of the way cabin that is off the beaten path, I would hold up in one of the ski towns. This might be a dangerous endeavor at first since there could be infected hiding up there, but all of these buildings are made to last through long winters, they will hold up just fine for a short season. When there, it would be wise to check out the sporting good shops since you know there is only one way to stop a zombie from munching on you and that is by destroying the brain. I would try to find a gun, but a machete would be the best weapon for the woods since you can’t shoot through trees to stop a herd from chasing you, besides it would be too noisy. 

Next on the list would be to find a food source and, in the mountains, this might be a little bit more difficult. Although they are pretty populated these days, I would expect the grocery stores to be picked over at this point, but there are other alternatives. Staying within the city limits of a ski town, I would hit up the resorts and hotels first since once again, they have to have a larger supply of food just in case a blizzard comes and shuts down the town. With a weapon in hand and food strapped on my back I would take to the old trails leading up to where the people that don’t want to be bothered are staying.

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I would hope to find a cabin in the summer so I could track back and forth with all of my supplies, but that would be the perfect situation and we all know when the world goes to hell, nothing will be the way you expected it. Having to either build or take a sled, I would load it up and trek up the hills to find a place of safe haven. This is where it could get a little bit dicey since I know I am not the only one that would want to live in the mountains when the zombies come and there may be some problems with the locals. If I am able to find a cabin that looks good for just me, I would definitely check it out, but if there are people living in it, I might have to detour from my plan and try to survive in a group for some time. The only problem is that if they do not have any food, would I be willing to give mine up to stay with them?

I think I would have to give it a try, up to a point, but if they are not able to pull their weight when needing to resupply, I am pretty sure I would lose it and feed them to the fishes. With the cabin becoming my own, I would hope that it was stocked with enough wood to make it through the long winter, since for the most part, I would not want to leave unless I absolutely had to. With the occasional trek down from the cabin to the city, I would try and find anything that could be useful for the long stay away from civilization and the longer I’m up there alone, the better everything would look. 

After the winter passes, I would need to start hunting. With deer, elk, mountain goats and of course rabbits, I am sure that I would be able to catch my limit, but I would have to be careful since the scent of blood might attract the undead towards my hideout. I would need to skin and clean by a river so the blood washes away quickly, then find a good area to dry out the meat in the summer sun that does not get too windy. That would be the biggest issue since meat is meat and the smell does carry for miles and if it does not attract the undead it could get someone else’s attention, like someone else looking to take my cabin from me.

Well, there you go. This is my survival plan when the zombies come and take over the world. Do I think this is the best plan? You know living in Colorado, I might be able to sneak into NORAD, but I don’t want to be around too many people when the food finally runs out and a new type of panic takes place. I hope that you enjoyed this, and that it gives you something to think about. If you do not agree with the plan, feel free to leave a comment or drop me a line, I am easy to find unless I do not want to be found. I wish I was a ninja, so then I could just stay at home during the apocalypse, but that is a discussion for another day.

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